On Finding Balance With Our Passions

Today, I begin a journey that's very close to my heart: teaching martial arts. I put on the Sensei hat (or belt, rather). But it's not the first time I've worn the belt.

In 2001, Metamora High School offered me a full-time job teaching English. I loved it, and I wanted to get more involved with the kids outside of the classroom. I had played some basketball, so I approached our coach. He let me tag along as an assistant, although I did little more than keep track of stats at the games. To be fair, I didn't know much about coaching basketball. Except for my five minutes of fame in junior high (yes, I once scored the game winning shot in 7th grade!), I didn't play organized ball. I played street ball. I was used to throwing elbows and getting punched.

Me, demonstrating a flying side kick about 15 years ago!

My friends and I walked the streets after school looking for game. More than once, we started a game with the wrong group of guys, a group who didn't like losing. A cheap foul turned into a fist fight. I had been chased down streets and got in plenty of tangles thanks to good, old street ball.

It's one thing that motivated me to walk into a martial arts school about twenty-seven years ago. And it changed my life.

When coaching organized basketball didn't work out, I had a brilliant idea-- why not offer an after school martial arts program?

The first year I taught the program, we had perhaps a dozen students. Near its peak, we had over one-hundred. Amazing. I went from teaching one karate class a week to teaching ten, at multiple schools in our district. Over ten years, we produced eleven black belts and dozens of world champions. We were featured in Black Belt Magazine, earning best youth program in the entire USA.

I look back at those days and wonder how the heck it all happened. How did I have the energy? Why did I ever quit?

Yeah, at some point, I dove so deeply into my passions that I nearly drowned. That happens to me frequently, and I write this post for  three reasons: 1. to connect with others who have similar experiences, 2. to provide some insight so that we don't drown in our passions, and 3. to also to offer myself a note of caution, as I open up the doors to my dojo once again.

Time and time, I've repeatedly drowned in various passions. I didn't simply quit the old martial arts school because I was burned out. Primarily, I was offered a full-time job as a professor at my local college. When I switched schools, it was too much to do both.  Immediately, though, I looked for ways to get involved that weren't specifically martial arts. So, I turned to fitness classes. I taught cardio kickboxing (okay, somewhat similar) and other classes. I told myself I would do this no more than two days a week.

By the end of the year, I was teaching fitness classes five days a week at my college. How did this happen again?

I continued that for a few years, until again I found myself drowning again, wishing I had more time to do X, Y, and Z.

Me, competing in kata at the US Open World Championships

I had an itch to write a novel, a dream I always wanted to do. Once I found a publisher, it ignited a new flame, and suddenly I was waking up early or staying up late to write thousands of words every single day. I completed a trilogy with one new book every year (not to mention a dozen other drafts of projects saved on my computer).

Some of us have this kind of personality. Is it obsessive? Maybe. I get excited very easily. It's one of my greatest strengths, but it's also a weakness.

I've mapped out a full semester of lessons for our karate club. I also forced myself to deeply consider the theme of The Karate Kid. In the film (and in its TV follow up, Cobra Kai), the biggest theme is about balance. "Balance not only for karate. Balance for whole life," Mr. Miyagi says.

I want to do it all-- write hundreds of new books, restart a martial arts program that will create a dozen more black belts, revolutionize fitness, be the best professor I can be, be the best friend and family member possible ... but that's not possible, not to do it all.

So, I apply the lesson of balance to my life. Today, I have 3-5 days where I get up early to write, and my goal is to write 1000 words. (In the past, it was 3000 words a day.) Not only is this a more easily attainable goal, but it allows me to do other things.

My first book series

For the new martial arts club, I have promised myself not to keep adding classes. I am developing personalized training plans. Students who want more training will follow that and document that. I will still happily work with them each week, but I will limit my time. So I don't drown.

I prioritize my work as a professor, and I no longer teach fitness classes. This way, I can take fitness classes. I attend 3-5 fitness classes each week as a student. This is how I refuel to have energy for all my goals.

My advice to all and my caution for my self: reflect on your work/life balance. Find balance. Make time for what you love. But be careful not to drown in your own passions. I've made the mistake of killing the very passions that I loved so much at one point. Teaching, martial arts, writing, fitness-- these are all important things in my life.

We owe it to ourselves and to our passions to find this balance.

How do you balance you life/work passions?